WHEN HELL FREEZES OVER
Every day, I receive 2,000+ e-mails, and at least once a
day, I get the suggestion to get myself booked on Oprah.
This morning I realized my chances of getting the NOTMILK
message to America on the Oprah Winfrey Show were a lot
closer to "none" than "extremely slim." Finding myself
stranded in the Buffalo, New York airport magazine store, I
noticed a prominently displayed copy of the October, 2000
issue of "The Oprah Magazine" (circulation of over 1 million
Imagining that the milk industry might exert some power on
Oprah by advertising in her impressive magazine, I looked
for evidence of the dairy influence. There on page 113 was
Frankie Muniz, star of TV's "Malcolm in the Middle," posing
with his "Got Milk?" mustache. On page 117 was a full-page
ad for Dannon Drinkables, followed by an ad for Kraft
products on page 118.
How strong can bones get? On page 133, Dannon Yogurt's ad
presented their dairy argument. Oprah's magazine continued
with an ad for Land O' Lakes Butter on page 150, Stoneyfield
Yogurt on page 199, a two-page ad for Rice Krispies on page
200-201, an ad for Yoplait Yogurt on page 206, an ad for
Philadelphia Cream Cheese on page 272, and a Got Milk?
coffee ad on page 300. Last but not least, there was a
second cheesy Kraft calcium ad.
A full-page ad in "The Oprah Magazine" runs $67,275.
One dozen full-page dairy ads make for enormous cash flow
for Oprah. The total cost for those dozen ads is $807,300.
Multiply that times 12 months and you've got nearly $10
million per year of advertising revenue. Make no mistake
about it, folks. Oprah and her handlers have little reason
to kill the sacred cow by presenting any negative milk
issues on her nationally syndicated television show.
Oh, yes...here's some special advice to you from Oprah in
her July/August issue:
"Accept what people offer. Drink their milkshakes.
Take their love." --- Wally Lamb, Author